the KhidmahRaffick page

ATTENTION!

2009-07-03T14:18:00.002+08:00

this blogspot is no longer in use.

khidmah raffick has moved to tumblr.

please click here to keep stalking her.

bare with my noobness for awhile.

have a nice day =)

khid.

spin the wheel around

2009-07-03T00:24:00.004+08:00

just when i thought i could never be as happy as i did before, i am once again proven wrong. my friends have impeccably perfect timing. hearts to sam and zara loves. god they know how to make me smile. and just when im about to cry, dweeby makes me feel better but as always once im fine he'll make me cry again. but at least i'll be crying because he made me not anyone else. and harry bass, always there to be the ear i always complain to. and not to mention two very cute (in my eyes) boys totally making me feel way better heh heh. life has its way of turning things around. i love that.

*****************************************

who in the world cares if she has a s**tape. she's a good singer and i appreciate her. i love her! not to mention harith and i bapak perasan im her and he's chuck in gossip girl. classic khid&harith antics. enjoy. owh and listen to her other songs. delish!

khidmah raffick owes her friends.

kababom!

2009-07-02T13:18:00.002+08:00

happy belated but never the less sweet seventeenth

to,

mohd harith (29/6) ee ling (30/6) reza adam (30/6) shazlan (1/7)

its been a whole 3 months now. i've been missing u crazy. its true that u dont know what u got till its gone. so i just gotta brace myself and face my mistake. theres nothing else to do but face it. stay strong. though i know i can only do it for so long.

i use to have it all worked out. now im slowly crashing. making sure i feel every bit of pain on the way. its like my brain has gone totally haywire, and i cant do anything about it.

my only cure, my only way back to being sane has left. gone. far away and im quite sure he wont be coming back. he sped off in his car on the track that he said was his life. that i was once on. not anymore.

finding the way back would be hard. but i must try my best for if i never try i shall never know. maybe i might have a better life in store for me. so why should i be stuck her. i gotta leave all the pain behind. no matter how long it takes i can do it and i will do it. no matter how long it takes.

Cut my hair 'cuz it reminded me of you

I know you like the long 'do,

Had to switch my attitude up

Thinkin' of changing up how I ride, No more

On the passenger side

Too bad you miss out on the way that I drive it

I'm so over it, I've been there and back

Changed all my numbers and just in case you're wondering

I got that new

I'm a single girl swag

Got me with my girls and we're singin' it

khid.

im in a good place.

2009-06-29T21:31:00.003+08:00

happy 17th to urs truly =)

im officially allowed to drive. weehee. but i dont think i will just yet. hehe

dear friends and families, thank you so much for putting color in my life. like literally. hhaha.

my lovelies surprised me... they got me a cake =) thanks so much! then zaf got me an electric blue sling pouch. thanks so much love! like no shit nye long time lover lah u!

after school i went to watch transformers with the rest of the jing bang gang. and aivin love treated me to subway. thanks so much baby vin!

and kakak just got back and she got me a watch.... awwhhhhh! a yellow one too! ily u!

the funny part is both kakak and zaf wanted to get me the same stuff. but it was gone!! so they got 2 differently awesome gifts! funny kan!

transformers was awesome!! im gonna kill nabeel for being a spoiler though. haha ok so 3 of my 4 ultimate besties have wished me. my birthday wont be complete without ur wish lah dweeb!

harith gave me the cutest text ever. love him to bits.

from zaffy

from kakak =)

thanks to everyone who made my day. from the bottom of my heart, thank you =)

khid.

when i drive myself, my life is found.

2009-06-26T17:24:00.006+08:00

The cities grow

The rivers flow

Where you are, I'll never know

But I'm still here

If you were right and I was wrong

Why are you the one who's gone

And I'm still here

Still here

its been so long since i've blogged. i thought i wanted to stop blogging cause i was thinking that i have better things to do, but i was wrong. this is the only place that i can express myself without having to hear the reaction of people right there on the spot. here, i can flow. here, i can be me.

cheesy! haha. but im not gonna keep it bottled up. but i wont technically tell it to anyone's face... right?

i had a rough night. it hurts to know someone u love would do so much to hurt u in a split second. i said i wont forgive u. but i will. i already did. but i'll never look at u the same way again. i've had to much of u. and a break would be good dear sister.

and u. can u please for once stop blaming my friends. they helped me alot with things u can never help me with. and they're good friends to me and im sorry if u cant see that. they are part of what makes me sane. im so pissed at u guys. so disappointed. so sad. i hope u would trust me that i could make my own decisions. im freaking 17. im old enough. not saying im wise enough. i would always be learning. even when im 60, but im old enough to start learning on my own. whether u believe it or not, i have good friends. not all of them are bad. i know that for sure.

Seeing the ashes in my heart

The smile the widest

When I cry inside and my insides blow apart

I tried to wear another face

Just to make you proud

Just to make you put me in my place

But everything you wanted from me

Is everything that I could never be

***************************************************

One in the same

We’re anything but ordinary

One in the same

I think we’re almost legendary

You and me, The perfect team

Shaking at the scene

We’re one in the same!

to my noises.

oh happy night

2009-06-03T23:22:00.000+08:00

happy happy. fun fun

so we went to bangsar just now to Mar's northern indian restaurant. it was awesome. mar picked us all up. isnt it funny that most of us have already passed 17 but none of us drive.. yet. hahah. which reminds me my birthday is this month! and someone's birthday is tomorrow!

so anyways, it was such a nice night. all girls. never have i done the "all girls" thing. so it was fun. we bonded like crazy! like super duper. and can u believe it.... after a year and half of being with sarah, never have i seen her out of her school uniform.. and it was a miracle her mom let her out today! so finally we hung out =)

u know how people have pretty pictures when its candid and they're laughing? so mar was trying her ultimate best to get one of those pictures and its simply hilarious. we had fake laughs throughout the night. we're lame but yes we love it =p when i was out o felt like there was so many things to blog about. but yet now while im here...... im so blank. hahah i think im just tired. so imma leave it at that. i wonderful night with the noises!

khid

another birthday

2009-06-03T09:08:00.001+08:00

happy eighteenth eugene!

have a blast in uni or i'll kill u

haha

khid.

in love with...

2009-06-01T20:04:00.000+08:00

so i've only read the book halfway right. but im so into it right now. especially now that i've seen the trailer. cant wait. i got goosebumps watching it. im sooooo excited. i dont even care if its during finals. im gonna go to the premiere and thats final.

i've been waiting for this for what...? 6 months now. arghhhhhhh. so damn excited.

p.s; is it just me or has the cast been working out? awesomeeeee. owh and im gonna hoepfully finish reading the book by tonight. ooo again, im sooo excited =D

khid.

-.-

2009-05-31T23:45:00.000+08:00

hazimmm says:

khid!you're not gonna believe it!

Khidmah, says:

ape dieee

hazimmm says:

ALL TIME LOW was in KLIA yesterday evening and WE didnt know that

OMG FUCK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Khidmah, says:

DONT FUCKING LIEEEEE

hazimmm says:

sedih sial1

I SWEAR TO GOD

Khidmah, says:

no shittttttttt/

how u know?

hazimmm says:

no shit man

twitter

Khidmah, says:

fishhhhhhhhhhh

what were they doing here?

hazimmm says:

layover from japan to australia

Khidmah, says:

SHIT MAN

hazimmm says:

nat dengan leon punya la menangis after i told them

ahaha

unbelievable.

this is not happening =0

damn mannnnn. damn...... i wonder why i dont use my twitter anymore. not after tonight babeyh. it'll be on my phone 24/7 hehe.

i went and watched monsters vs. aliens at OU just now =) it was.. cute. then i watched the other Boleyn girl. way too weird for me but i liked it. and now im having a gossip girl marathon. hehe. ok bye =)

khid.

HELLO

2009-05-31T11:09:00.000+08:00

omg. my parents read my blog?!

haha.

owh well. i dont mind i think. i have nothing to hide..... i think? hahah. its ok lah. i think im a normal 17 year old girl... i think? haha i dont know.

today is only the second day of holidays and im boredddddd as ever! omg. i feel like i wanna go out puas2. its not like i have anything to do at home pun. so yesterday, kakak li and i went "merempit' in KL. hahahha OMG. we really had nothing to do yesterday. so we rounding the whole of KL. thats how bloody bored we were. i wanna do something fun. any suggestions?

khid.

cookooocookoo

2009-05-30T00:26:00.000+08:00

hello holidays!

i love you!

i let my guard down for you. and now i faded into someone else. someone that i dont wanna be. i bet u dont even know my favorite song. u wanna change me. and i turned into someone else. my true color's gone. i dont even know myself. i faded into what u want. then u left me lost and lonely. i burned all my bridges when i was with u. what do u expect me to do now? i dowanna be what i am now. u ran my whole life down and now ur watching me fade away. i am broken and i know its what u want. all u do is hold me down.

but what would u do if i told u, u cant control my life. what would u say if i left today with no regrets and no goodbyes. what would u do if i told u there is no more u and i. i dont know whats going on with u. i try so hard but i dont believe in u. ur not the guy i thought i knew. what would u say if i left u there to cry. what would u do if i say just go ahead and cry!

zafirah zahari love.

with azielia aka hayley, idlan aka wacky and musa aka hard rock abs

happy holidaysssssss. so we had teachers celebration right in school just now! i though the nabeel and hazimS take of "hit me baby one more time" was awesome! hahaha i thought i only get turned on by nabeel when he plays the guitar but just now he didnt play his guitar, he just sang. and yet i still got turned on! hhahaha and the sperm boys performed again! hahaha i just love them. they look so hot. mar was HOT! already as were we all.

i slept smiling yesterday =) i am happy today, despite the very annoying glances from *coughcough* some people. and oooooo june is gonna be filled with birthdays! yay. and i cant wait to go to mar's restaurant. nyumm2. i have a feeling im gonna be fat during the holidays. but owh well. dah lah kakak and i are gonna take li to the arab shop tomorrow. and knowing li, she's a big eater and we always follow in her footsteps. ahha

im currently so into the veronica's. gile boleh relate to their songs. owh and i just finished watching one missed call the matsalleh's version. haha the jepun one is way scarier. anyways i am so super scared now. so i will be camping in kakak's room. ngeehee.

goodnight losers,

khid

gotta remember to breath.

2009-05-26T19:08:00.000+08:00

school is a motha fuckin bitch!

dumbass. if it wasnt for exams and shit i wont even be going to school.

owh well. daddy is fine with it =)

so life has been annoying lately. but then i get that we all have our ups and downs. everyone has been so annoying lately. except my happy pills of course =) so i finally snapped at school just now. at the wrong person too. my headmistress =o owh well. sorry for her.

nothing much about that but to sum up all of the events that has been happening in the past mont has just been too overwhelming for me. no ones knows exactly the amount of stress that i've been having. i'v been having alot of "argghhhh" moments. haha so yeah. i totally went psycho just now =/ but again. i shall always keep in mind there are always people who are having worst times than i am and that i should always be grateful with what i have =)

so anyways, since i was all loco at school just now, harith ajaked go for a chocolate treat. but i ended up twisting things so that he belanja'ed me chocolates. but ended up i didnt want chocolates so he belanja me teh-o-ais-limau. my favorite. so yeah. i felt way better after hanging out with my happy pills. then i met up with my parents and what do u know, mrs headmistress called my dad! hahaha. dude seriously? as if lah my dad wanna waste his time with u. and dont u dare think that my dad doesnt care for me and thats why he doesnt wanna see u. fucker!

if i was him, i wouldnt wanna waste my time either. so yeah. its times like these when i really appreciate my parents who understand me like the back of their hands. alhamdulillah =)

omg. why suddenly im so baik? haha

loves. sarah missing =(

harithhh.

totally random -.-

so yeahhhhh. anyways, we're all on fucking holiday mood! yay! so many things planned. hopefully all will be fulfilled. only 2 papers to go. then were temporarily free. i think im gonna head to singapore with my sister. maybe. hopefully it happens =)

owh and one more fucking sucky fact.

if its true that the SPM trials finish on th e25th of september, i'll be so upset. because singapore GP is on the same date. so if they dont bring forward the examination, i'll probably fly to singapore straight after exams. damn, my sister got me hooked on f1 =D

love,

khidmahraffick

beer. haha

2009-05-24T00:58:00.000+08:00

It's late and I'm feeling so tired

Having trouble sleeping.

This constant compromise

Between thinking and breathing.

harloooooooooo. im highh! on sugar =)

i got back from cyberjaya fully stuffed with lamb and chicken and rice and arabic tea and trans-fat free apricot cream cake and halal beer. HAHAHHAHA gile fat. so i went swimming in the afternoon for no reason. but i shall go to the gym tomorrow.

the ride back to subang was damn cracked. then we had nothing else better to do mummy wanted to rounding in putra heights. so we did. and it was damn kesian cause abah sleepy edi. hahah. it was funny when we drank the "halal beer" cause we drank them from the tiny cups cause we shared one bottle. and when kakak drank it from the bottle mummy was like "ha! lawa anak dara minum macam tu kan" chill lah it was only zapple. well it tasted like zapple. then we were abit cracked and mummy was like "ha dah mabuk!" funny lah mummy! the arab restaurant we went to was nice. it had a nicer atmosphere then the one we used to go to just by the corner. so yeah. im so stuffed. and bored.

Some kind of therapy

Is all I need

Please believe me

Some instant remedy

That can cure me completely

ok bye =D

p.s; i wanna get contact lenses lah. but tak tau if it suits me or not. hmmmm

khid<3

owh2 andddd,

happy belated birthday to addie loh syg!

and goodluck for uni life to eugene m =)

ok. really now. like no shit. like for real. good bye suckers =P

wishlist.

2009-05-19T19:09:00.000+08:00

omg. im pretty sure i screwed up my add math paper 1 and tomorrow is chem and im here infront of the laptop. what is wrong with me!? haha. so anyways, i want these. ok bye =)

wanna go "study"

khid.

grrr

2009-05-18T14:42:00.000+08:00

happy seventeenth birthday to

justin james ng!

crazy weekends. apparently i wasnt the only one who went out the whole of the wekends. i wasnt at home the whole of saturday. came back at 12 and yesterday i was out till 9. haha and exams are still on. crazy right. i know.

yesterday we went ou and i found this top that i liked! i want pleaseeee. grrrr. now i really wanna rob someplace. haha jkjk. oooo. or i wanna be jumper. so i just jump and get any baju i want. oooo awesome.

today i went to school and my eyes were so puffed up that its not even funny. haha. stupid lah yesterday i cried like orang gile. then just now at school my heartbeat went psychotic. and sarah and i were like "omg panic attack!" hahahaha my eyes still hurt tho. we had agama exams just now. sucked. tomorrow addmath! shitttt.

i want this top =( and kakak got the necklace for me =)

Khidmah, says:

u should see i went to school td

everyone terkejut cause i had poofed up eyes

like no shit nye poofy

haha

Jane says:

why what did he do?

he's a jerk. why you crying over a jerk?

meh i duduk atas dia

Khidmah, says:

hahahha

tak payah

zaf and sarah dah duduk ats die

lol

Jane says:

HAHAHHAHAHHA

okay i cant beat that alone

maybe i can join

love nye, khid

pissy

2009-05-17T22:03:00.000+08:00

STUPID CRANKY BITCH!

will story tomorrow.

bye.

khid.

moodswings.

2009-05-16T16:45:00.000+08:00

i got a new toppppppp!

weeheee. ok im temporarily happy!

last thursday a funny thing happened. so adrian ruzain eugene and i were walking to 7-e right. and eugene was skipping his class. then when we were walking we hear a "plakk" sound. i saw 2 cicaks fell on eugene! ahhaha! one on his shoulder and one on his feet. eugene turned and adrian started laughing. at first eugene was like "what?" then adrian said "got lizard on ur back!" then eugene started screaming like a girl! hahahahaha. we were all hysterical. dah lah tu he screaming like a girl then jumping2 and saying "get it off!" ahahhahahaha. the lizard ended up biting his neck! lol. haoih. thats what u get when u skip class eugene!

yesterday i went to parade. very the stressed out from things. so mummy pampered me abit =) she got me a top then she treated me to ice cream. hehe.

right now im waiting for my slow poke kakak to come back so li, her and i can go running =) after 5 torturous hours of tuition.

ok thats all. bye !

p.s; syazwan bruised my arm =( not my fault that i ejek-ed him about making out with J. hehe

khid.

a little too often

2009-05-14T14:31:00.000+08:00

you better have a good reason why u didnt show up yesterday.

because im never forgiving you.

no ka-ching!

2009-05-12T16:16:00.000+08:00

ok so i admit im a stalker! haha

whats so wrong about that. haha. ok so i stalked people on fb right. best ok! anyways. i stalked a couple of old friends i was so surprised to see how they turned out. so preety! i love their style and theyre so different now. so matured. im so jealous. hahah

so anyways. looking at them are making my craving to shop come back. i wanna do a total wardrobe makeover. haha im so bored of the same old jeans and t-shirt. i wanna get nice casual yet not too plain blouses or something. i neeeeed to get new shoes. i want new flats! and new flip flops. and i wanna get new bagsss. i wanna get the oversized tote, the sling pouch and whatever nice i can lay my hands on. i wanna get new jeans. straight cut and skinny. cept' i might not pull of the skinnies lah kan cause i have huge thighs. ahah but wtv lah. i wanna get new shorts and tights too. owh and i need a new swimsuit. but i think i'll get that later lah kot. i want new board shorts too. i saw this really cute one in roxy. ngeheee.

wahhh. i want so many things. but i dont even have 20 bucks in my wallet. damnn. owh and i need new wallet too. when lah is my daddy gonna get rich so he can spoil me. hahah. shit im really wanting to shop. but for now i wanna concentrate on... (no not studies) ..... loosing my fucking weight. then confirm i'll look good in anything kan. hahahahhaha

owh and another reason to add to my "why i must kurus" list is that my cousin is getting married in november! so gotta look good kan. plus prom is coming and redang(hopefully) so yeah. haha whatever lah. actually im doing this for my health! hahaha lame. anyways. back to my cravings, so yeah i wanna shop!

wait its exam week and im talking bout shopping. wtf. my fingers are officially ugly. writing for 8 hours in the past 2 days gave my finger an ugly bump. but then again all of us have it now. hehe. tomorrow is PJ and sejarah. sigh. pj pun kena ade exam ke? total wtf!

wokeyh. thats all.

bye

hormones!

2009-05-10T18:25:00.000+08:00

i dont like today.

i hate today.

today is cranky day!

that fucking bastard wont get off my mind.

call me lah stupid!

happy 54th birthday abah. im upset with u today but i love u!

the last dinner

2009-05-09T23:26:00.000+08:00

ok. so we went to the concored in shah alam just now to celebrate mother's day and daddy's birthday. we stuffed ouselves like crayh-zeeeee! the food we ate ranged from raw fish, to fondue to loads of types of cheese. haha no wonder i've gained about 15% of my weight. *sigh*

anyways, it was funnnn. i ate oysters for the first time just now. HAHA. apparently ur not supposed to chew right, just swallow. so i did and i almost chocked. the thing is like bapak besar! i cant even begin to explain how big my belly is now! OMG!

owh and i have always had this phobia of eating raw fish, but just now we all tried eating the raw red and white tuna! damnnn man. it wasnt stinky or anything. but the fact that its raw is just so disturbing. haha. we were there for around FOUR freaking hours. mummy punye "nak enjoy makan" hahah. luckily, i wore a big shirt. so i dont need to cover sgt and suck my belly in!

and now, mummy is making me run the whole of subang in the morning. i dont really mind. im like so fat now its not even funny anymore.

in the morning just now. well actually noon lah cause we woke up at 12 -.- harith and i went to parade and we actually STUDIED! amazing right! hahaha. then shazwan and addie came with some guy named mat? haha so we went to lunch and they ended up playing deytona when i went home -.-

so yeah. back to the dinner thinggy. i think that shall be the last meal i will eveeerrrr have. over i know! haha but wtf lah kan! well during dinner i thought i had soooo many things to blog about. but now im here infront of my screen i dont know what to write anymore =/

btw, i now have 13 freaking kittens. please contact me if u want any of it. take all! i dont mind. haha

xoxo. khid

mummy love!

abah love!

minah kecoh!

btw. i notcied i have a big head -.-

for princess leia.

2009-05-08T00:05:00.000+08:00

i had every intention of making things between us ok. i missed u i did. but my heart told me not to go for it but i though whatheheck. lets just try. u proved me right. i should've trusted my gut. the first time i met u. u were so sweet. i thought ok this could work. but as time passed i got to know u better and u showed ur true colours. my friends said we were moving too fast. but i liked the adventure, the thrill of not knowing what was gonna happen. what could happen.

i lost alot when i was with u. but i trusted u. i gave u my heart and soul. i wanted things to work. i dont know why i keep trying when u still hurt me like u hurt me before. whats wrong with me? ur wrong for me. why cant i get my head right. i feel so fucked up now. for i was fooled by u more than once.

u called me yesterday, ur voice sounded full of fury and u didnt let me on what was going on. it pissed me off that you would call me and leave things hanging. today i asked why were u so angry and u said nothing. i was really being nice when i talked to u. i really didnt want us to be angry at each other. well its too late now. i expressed every feeling i felt and all u said was "wtv lah" fuck u man. have u no heart no feelings? u proved my point when i say u dont care. u said u needed to head to bed bacause u had training in the morning. so i said ok go and train and leave everything hanging.

the words that came next bruised me the most. those words made my mind up for me. your words.

you said that u will go and train and that training is ur life and if i cant live with that then its ok. i can stop contacting u. u said ur training comes first from the day u started. so it was my desicion. now i know all this time u have been lying. u said i was ur everything and i came first before everything. so since ur racing is so important to u, u can go and marry ur car. fuck it. i dont give a damn anymore. for all i care, ur car can take u to hell. i cant believe the person u turned out to be. this this has been happening to u alot. i figures it wasnt ur fault. but now. im SURE its only your fault.

and i find that ur made at me bacause i go out with a friend? so what?! u have friends to. u go out with them almost everyday and u come back late. i tell u not to but do u listen to me? no right! u expect me to listen to u and obey ur rules? i dont belong to u! i deserve better than this! so if u decide to come back, make sure u've changed. cause after all we've been through, u will most definitely have a place in my heart.

look at me what is wrong me. fuck u man. fuck u so bad! dont call me cause i wont pick up. u act like ur fine without me. we both know ur crumbling inside.

i was always right. u were always wrong. i was always the one to give in. u were always the cause of fights. i am finding a way to move on. but u shall rot in hell.

so fuck you very much.

khid.

blaargh

2009-05-07T00:09:00.000+08:00

hello says the earth! haha ok so there are a couple of things i want to say.

u see that male up there? thats nixon. and he's hot! wohhooooo. he's from framing hanley. addiction of the night he is =)

i wanna freaking go shopping!

but im broke =( and exams are coming up. theres no time to shop. we'll theres no time to blog infact but to hell with that. release stress maaa. haha

exams are next week 0.o i hope i've been studying enough. but i kow i can do better. thats why im gonna study like hell =) getting good grades is a nice feeling =)

oi! wtf is ur problem man! u wanna cari gadoh with me? do u want a 27.5 kg dumbell's fist in ur face? i dont fucking owe u anything ok. i didnt loose anything either. i dont even know why i keep trying. i cant change people. its corny but its the sad truth. so unless u wanna be nice to me, u can just go and fuck urself. its funny how u can still hurt me when ur not here anymore.

oi! u oso fuck off lah. bloody rempit stalker. should've just asked dinie to make it clear to u that day that i dont wanna be stalked.

im bored! lets get high.

i love,

samzaraharrynicktysonrextomjosh!

this picture is cool kan? its like the flying V! ahhaa thats ika,me and mei.

explain to me this conspiracy

2009-05-06T00:28:00.000+08:00

i dont freaking get it. can someone please explain to me. do guys find it hot when a girl is too wild? gile lah wtf? i tgk i meluat kot! sure ur pretty, but if u act like that all ur pretty-ness goes to waste dont u think so?

do u think its cool to go around posting pictures of u partying. all sweaty and digusting? with booze in one hand and a cigarette in another? wearing clothes 2 sizes too small for u, and ur boobs and ass starts to spill out. hair so messy and face all red from the liquor and pills and god knows what. i mean seriously? dance with any tom dick and harry and post up the pictures? nasty much.

ok. i shall stop. im sorry. i just needed to spill it. as for me, i'll wait for school to end =) hehe

big mouth,

khid

we cool? haha

2009-05-02T23:22:00.000+08:00

u know how people go club hopping? like lindsay lohan? spotted in like 5 different clubs in a night? well. we are wayyyy cooler! Li, kakak and i that is. cause we go mamak hopping! haha. or tempat makan hopping. ahha

yesterday we went to taipan to get dinner at this singapore shop. then we headed to the TanjungMamakBistro at usj. today, we had dinner at bawang merah, dessert in taipan and then off for drinks at OldTownWhite coffee in taipan. gile lah. ahhaa but i didnt eat the whole day so its a-okay=)

so i woke up and went straight to tuition today. finished tuition and went straight home, got ready then off to school for leo's iu. very lazy to elaborate. just wanted to state that i went. the company was fun though! pictures have been uploaded into my facebook =)

right now my kaki hurts like hell! all of a sudden. kinda freaky. ok its exactly 12. time for cinderella to go! haha gd night =)

cindewelly,

khid

feel the pain of mother earth

2009-05-01T17:32:00.000+08:00

cuti day! i ended up sleeping at 4 am yesterday when my internet started to give me problems. as its a holiday, my body has set its self to lazy mode. i'll go to sleep late and i ended up waking up at 1pm just now. hahah got up to abah bising cause he's hungry and stuff. haha so had a long nice hot bath and headed to shah alam for makannnn!

when we got home, kakak wanted to go to the ZARA warehouse sale or something. i wanted to follow but figured it was too hot and i wasnt in the mood. so on the way out she dropped me off at mamak then straight to tuition. OMG i officially HATE mr mike =( he made me cryyyy! hahahah he pranked me. assfart lah he! he's so gonna kena again from me!

muahhahahahhaha.

now im at home alone waiting for kakak to come back home. mummy and abah went to bangi. its so damnnnnn hot man! its all the smoke and carbon release and crap. my sister calculated that she has to plant 7 trees to cover back the cost of carbon emitted by her car. just a small car. imagine those people who have like 10 mercs or bmws or all those huge cars. this is making me scared. i feel so darn pro earth! ish. bodoh punya whatever ford that invented cars! ahhahahah

owh and abah is allowing me to take my undang during the holidays =D haha gile hypocrite

xoxo

khidmah

the night will go on.

2009-05-01T02:54:00.000+08:00

here i am. at 2.58 in the morning. i cant sleep. im layaning kanye west. hehe.

tomorrow in(is) labour day! so theres no school! yay. but tuitions still on. i skipped school just now and stayed home to "study" haha. well i really did actually. chemistry infact =)

then headed to mamak bistro go makan with sarah and the jing bang gang. then we all headed to school for the IUday rehearsals. i have a feeling IU is gonna be awesome. hehe. i wanna watch the sketch! seems funny! and nabeel and elroy will be singing one of my all time favorites "drops of jupiter" weeeee. ok im damn cracked now. and its freaking 3 in the morning. i think my hyperness is a sign on(of) slight psycho-ism?? haha see what i mean?! god!

ooooo. blink 182 is playing on my psp! weeheee.

attempt to sing;

always i know ull be at my show

watching waiting........

say it aint so

will not go

turn the lights off

carry me home

nanananananannaanan........

hahaha. okok better go and tido before i turn fully psychotic.

owh and the brackets are actually words that i salah type. then i post. then check again tgk salah. haha see i told u im now psychotic. and now my playlist turned emo! ajhaha from blink 182 and kanye west to a fine frenzy and avril lavigne -.- swt

xxoo,

khid-licious

(inspired by lawlicious.) HAHA

phobia

2009-05-01T00:43:00.000+08:00

im sorry.

sam and zara! help me please

1234

2009-04-28T20:11:00.000+08:00

this has got to be the cutest video ever made!

pay attention. read whats written. and see the end.

i've got issues!

2009-04-28T19:02:00.000+08:00

so my bump gave me a black eye! haha.

ika was right. the doctor said something like the gravity pulled the blood from my bump to my eye area. so now i have a black eye. grr.

ive been so stressed up lately. so scared for my studies. but i know i can do it. i have to do it.

kakak says i gotta get my life sorted out. and thats what i plan to do. i shall ignore the silly little things that usually gets in the way and just FOCUS. i am all i need to get through everything. just me myself and i! haha lame i know but at least i think im convincing myself. maybe?

so yeah. here i go on my journey through life. wish me luck.

and omg. i just realised i havent eaten for the whole day except for aliaa's brownies and sarah's cheese tarts at school. nyummmmm

love,

khidmah raffick

im no good for u. and ur too good for me.

aint nothing but a gangsta party.

2009-04-24T16:58:00.000+08:00

woah. manyak lama tada update woa.
haha. ok so the internet has been sucky lately. cannot connect lah what lah. ish crap betul lah.

ok anyways, on saturday, i went to OU in the morning with kakak and Li to teman kakak cut hair. then to interact IUday. it was aight. takdelah best mana. i actually just went to see azielia perform. then malam to 15. i seriously tak reti duk rumah. hehe

ok so last sunday, i went for this 10hour BM course thingy in UM. it was so funny how tony and ika got there. ika and tony were supposed to follow the bus but they were late. ika was right at the back of the bus when we moved and her mom was like honking already but the bus didnt stop. so they ended up following the bus all teh way.
half way, tony called ika and asked where were they. and from the road at the most bottome he could see busses passing on the fly over. i know it doesnt sound funny but the way the two of them we're talking about it was damn funny. hahhahehehehuhuhu *sigh*

on monday i didnt go to school. instead, we sebok-ed and followed the guys to their handball game in sri muda. arghhh. jamillah sucks man! because of her U-18 boys didnt get to go to quarters. all dhe wants was to balik early. ishhh. kesian sasi =( haha

on tuesday, was our turn to play!! damn suck ah this year. haha but it was ok. only 3 of us scored, me ika and ashley. and this year paling byk injuries. damn kesian. hahah some chick elbowed my forhead in the second game. and my head bruised so bad it seemed like a had a ping pong ball attached to my head. everyone started calling me flowerhorn grrr. and now, ika's theory is that the liquid from the bump is like going down or something and made me look like i have a black eye. gile gangster. ahhahahaha.
on the way to mamak bistro after the game, ika so smart went and sat on zairuls bonet. and we moved while she was on it. then i so pandai went and suggested to on the wiper cause she was holding on to the wiper. but dinie lagi pandai went and suggest to put the water aswell. but zairul was the genius to actually do it. the water squirted right on ika's ass and apparently the water was hot. so ika jumped off the car and zairul didnt stop and hit ika abit causing ika to go tumbling. like gile lah cuak that time. daym psycho lah ika. and she was laughing -.-

on wednesday i didnt go to school cause kepala ku kepeningan. hahah and thursday was like any other boring school day. and here i am on friday. bored to death and decided to blog. owh2 and sarah and i found a new past time. u know the faber castle water colour pencils? yeah we're playing with that now. hahah owh and my nose was peeling just now. so sarah and i dgn takde kejenye took the tape thingy stuck it on my nose and *pshaack* everything came off. lawak ah. but it was damn pedih =(

xox
khid

this makes me smile

2009-04-17T23:47:00.000+08:00

I miss you
Miss you so bad
I don't forget you
Oh it's so sad.

I hope you can hear me
I remember it clearly.

The day you slipped away
Was the day i found out
It, won't be the same

I didn't get around to kiss you
Goodbye on the hand
I wish that I could see you again
I know that I can't ooooooooooooh
I hope you can hear me
Cause I remember it clearly

I've had my wake up
Won't you wake up
I keep asking why.
And I can't take it
It wasn't fake it
It happened you passed by

(avril lavigne-slipped away)

u added me on myspace. then we started to comment and stuff. i started to check my myspace everyday form that day. u asked for my msn address and u added me there. that was when we started to talk about songs and stuff and we started to search stuff on youtube, haha. that was how we found our song. we decided to do a duet. when i started to get to know you. we ended up exchanging numbers and i still remember how i felt when i first heard ur voice.

my heart was beating so fast. u picked up the phone and got me at hello. ur friends were making noise in the background. u ended up inviting me to ur house for ur bithday and that was when i truly fell for u. thats when we really started to connect. how we spent so much on credits. and how u would have to pull ur house phone into ur room if we both run out of creds. i loved how u played your guitar when we talked. owh to hear u strum was the thing that could make me calm. i remember when u wrote a song for me. how i fell for the gentleman u are. u charmed me from the start. remember how we could always connect?

when u came over and practiced our song together i remember i sucked big time. but i was melting the whole time u were singing. my sister saw it. god how u made me feel. remember when u pulled me away from my friends and u took me for a walk. with everyone looking u were so nervous. and u asked if we "would wanna take the next step". i tried to act cool but i was jumping like crazy on the inside. but i was stupid to not give u an answer. remember when we went to get a pressie for our son? ended up rounding the whole of pyramid 5 times and we still didnt know what to get him. remember when we sang our song and someone screwed with ur guitar and we had to start over? that was funny. and we sang our song. remember we had breakfast before that. how the lady who mitak derma called me ur girlfriend and we were both like *crickcrick* ahha. remember during puasa u came to the house in 15. when we were infront there and i was playing with your hair and the back of your neck on the porch. then my mom ended up coming early and u ran into the house but my mom saw u anyways? haha that same night u went balik kampung. remember how u were always there and i was stupid to not say yes to ur question? remember?

bunga. bunga. orchid lah!

2009-04-17T23:21:00.000+08:00

goshhhh. i hate school!

i swear i do.

have u ever felt like just snapping.

and u just wanna go up to the teachers and slap the hell outta them?

fuck the teachers man!

fuck the people.

fuckkkkk fuckety fuck.

had a aunties day out just now. teman them go orchid shopping, haha funny lah they all. damn cute. i'll upload pictures later. they went crazyyyy.... over flowers. haha

there was this one point of time where the pak cik ice-cream came and beep-beep his honk. i shouted "i want ice-cream!" then tgk2 all the aunties oso baught ice-cream and started licking. so cute. then i slept in the car then stop at big plate to makan.

i just got back from parade with kakak and zaf cause i went to look for a shirt. but tak jumpe. soooo tak beli ape2. kakak went crazy just now. like really. ask zaf. she was about to strangle me. hahahah so yeah according to her, i need to get my life sorted! hahaha

and tomorrow is interact iu. all i wanna see is azielia anne perform. good luck babe.

ok bye. hehe

100th post!

so slow! haha

khid

for u i will

2009-04-16T11:41:00.000+08:00

its been so long since i had anything to do with you.

i just recently stalked you. =)

i gotta admit what u said is very thoughtful of u. i know u have to let me go. but i dont want u to. stuck in a dilemma i never wanted to be in. he's nothing compared to u. im not leaving him because i dont want to do to him what i did to u. but that doesnt mean im letting u go. u may go as u wish from my sight but u may never go from my heart.

im sorry i was so stupid to do this to you. im greatful to u for those months u made me feel. u made me a better person and anyone could see it. you were the glory to my morning u were the shine to my sun. u were my chords and my verse. u made me write like never before.

u make me happy but he makes me cry. u took care of me but i have to take care of him. u made my days he ruins them. everyone can see that i was at fault. than i am stupid and i see it too. it was a case of misunderstanding that became the worst kind for me. now im here with him broken hearted and he can never fix it. my body is with him cold as my heart is beating with you.

we had dreams and imaginations. we had a life of our own. we had plans. please forget them all. i am not worth the waste of your time. im sorry i wasted so much of it. i know it may seem like nothing now. but i do love u. i do. u were the best for me. im sorry

"u're leaving me, im pretty sure thats what u should do.

it hurts so bad.

im wanting u but i cant go back."

"you left a mark, and i wear it proudly on my chest.

above my heart. to remind me that i feel the best when im with u.

everything is effortless. u know its true.

my eyes are painted with regret.

and i dont need it"

u said will find someone to replace me. good luck and all the best to u. i hope u do find her and make u happier than i could ever make u. i hope she loves and cherishes you. u should know u can never be replaced.

forever and always,

khid.

everythings nothing without u

2009-04-15T15:45:00.000+08:00

why is our song on ur profile?

is it supposed to mean something?

or do u just like that song?

your confusing me?

dont do this again.

i might be the only one who notices.

maybe im paranoid.

maybe im not.

i know that song meant alot to u and me.

why is it on your profile?

sam.

2009-04-15T15:35:00.000+08:00

awwhhh sarahhh!

ily. u know me like the back of your hand. and i love u for that.

no bling for me

2009-04-15T14:57:00.000+08:00

i gotta admit.

it sucks to see things that u want but u can never have.

to be rich and famous.

or to be popular and loved.

to be perfect in every way.

but when i think again.

i am grateful with where i stand.

good friends, great family.

sure i might not have it all, not the car or the house or the brands or the looks.

but at the end of the day, its the thought and the sincerity that counts.

absolutely normal,

khidmah.

dosage of snappies.

2009-04-12T02:34:00.003+08:00

yes we are still budak2 sekolah. no rush in growing up =)

nicholas gelabah

apparently boys in our school grows on trees. sadly they dont seem to look so good. haha

tai ti and practice =)

we had to face the sun. thats why we turned into such dark people. grrrrr

xoxoxo

khid

last weeks moments =)

i forgot that i had these pictures.

you or you? who? what? why

2009-04-12T01:12:00.000+08:00

im feeling funny today.

sad a moment then hyper.

chirpy a moment then depressed.

feeling like a lost little girl.

stuck in the middle.

im so scared.

but i dont show it.

went to damansara just now. went to follow kakak get some free stuff. i bumped into A's S.D. i felt like strangling him for turning A into a possible "senget". grrrr-ness

then stopped by darus and had teh haliaaaaa. nyum. clears ur nose in a jiff.

im up waiting for a call. but i think his asleep. mangkuk! haha. and im sad that zaf cant make it to teman me to sepang tomorrow but its ok i still love u zaffy =D

it just occurred to me! i think i know why im having mood swings. so dont mess with me man! hahaha

and owh2. i just stalked sarahlove's blog. i knowwwwwwwww whats going on syg! ur JEALOUS! anyone can see it. i think when he reads ur post he'll know too. or maybe he's just trying to make u jealous and its working. hahahaha. gile lah obvious kan yg u suke die. zaf and i said it already. and it shows when u told me that he asked about me and u were like *whythefuckisheaskingaboutyou* face. it'll all work out =)

look what i found. this picture is damn lame. the subject that is. the photographer is awesome!

credits to adib =)

current song; my heart - paramore

lotsa love,

khid

2009-04-08T14:04:00.000+08:00

i cant feel you.

im not alright.

i cant hear you.

catch her

2009-04-06T14:52:00.000+08:00

the day started alright. as usual we had assembly. part of why i hate monday mornings is that we have to listen to ramblings.

but on our way to bio lab, nursarah who had sclerosis felt dizzy so she slipped and fell a few steps and landed on her ass. she didnt move and started crying. im pretty sure it hurts like crazy especially that she landed on her ass. apparently her back bone rotated or something. then,

her right arm couldnt move. then she couldnt move her right leg, then she couldnt feel her left leg.

she was in shock. the pbsm kids didnt dare to move her. so they called the ambulance and there was quite a commotion. i actually cried at one point of time when i saw her in pain.

so then ambulance came and they moved her. she was screaming! poor girl. i felt really sorry her! by that time every single teacher was surrounding her. like they made things better. all they did was made her even more nervous. i wish they were the ones who fell down.

then we got on with the day, when during add maths i saw things flying outside. i thought they were flies or some bugs. turned out to be bees! a whole lot of them. i looked to my right then to my left. everyone was calm untill i shouted "omg! are those bees?!" then EVERYONE started screaming. hahaha. started clossing all the doors and windows and just screamed! thank god they went away and didnt pass through our class.

and sarah owhs me two sodas! and i owe her one! we jinxed each other ther was once when we both said at the same time "late for what? jinx u owe me a soda jinx u owe me a soda jinx u owe me a soda. " hahhaha

all for now.

im screaming my lungs out to paramore and flyleaf! haha

and get well soon nursarah =)

kisses,

khidraff

vroom

2009-04-05T22:46:00.000+08:00

sooooo many secrets we're dug this week.

found who made out with who where and why.

found out boyfriends secrets from girlfriends.

found out the reason for friendship falling apart.

found out feelings that were never told.

found out most embarrassing moments.

found out who has crushes on who!

such a scandalous week. a stressful week. and a week to remember.

dear adi johan ali, please have an awesome time in n.s. will try to hangout when ur free and when im over at singapore. im pretty sure u'll come out hot from n.s. hahahahhahahaha. take good care. and congratulations on ur new baby sister =D

dear sarah mazlan, please do try to not get stress out so much as u know we all love u. just bare with things a couple more moths. we are all going through the same phase. u are not alone syg. haha and as for that bitch! she can just rot in hell.

dear zafirah zahari, i lover u(that was an error. but its funny so i wont delete. i meant i love u! not lover. hahah). and u got no probs. so no biggie =p

dear ninez ayesha ramlan, ur idea for english oral test rocks! and u rock ;P

dear syazlan sirajudin, dont so perasan that ur hamilton. the day u become hamilton is the day i become nicole. and we ALL know that will neverrrrr happen! hahahahahha

lots of xos

khidmahraffick

ding dong

2009-04-05T19:02:00.000+08:00

wooo hooo! super blardy bored!

snaps

2009-04-01T15:58:00.000+08:00

today was photo day. tomorrow will be so as well.

it was a tiring and hot day.

everyone brought their HUGE cameras. it was a fun day to camwhore.

some of the teachers were being a bitch.

but as always i was the bigger bitch to them. hehe

breaking news.

2009-03-31T16:11:00.000+08:00

omg!

guess what i just found out?
maybe this is old news but wtf.
A lost his V-ity to a SLUT!
hahahahha. joke of the day

lights out

2009-03-30T16:23:00.000+08:00

sports day was aight.

tiring. sad. happy.

earth hour was aight.

interesting. not up to what i expected. view was awesome

stardust

2009-03-28T00:11:00.000+08:00

sports day is tomorrow!

so, ponteng-ing has been a ritual this year. but this week has been one for the books.

i didnt go to class. AT ALL. awesome right. hehe

monday i just pontenged kononye got ed board stuff. tuesday i was hanging with the drama team and wed thurs and frid i was busy with "sports day stuff" hehe

today, we were all covered up in glitter! weeee. glitter never fails to make people happy! but then we got our hand ball jerseys and everyone turned sour! how sad. and stressful! arghhh. owh well

so this year we noticed that all the team captains and co-captains and all the kebaya girls are our friends. like our close circle. which was when we realized that its our freaking senior year. of course WE will conquer everything. hehe

besides, its fun to bully the kids *wink2*

ashwin trying to be cute. we got bored of making the sign for blue house so we made super hero masks. hehe there was heart boy, pokerface boy, bared, starboy etc. haha

pics will be uploaded later

zara z. as the triangular girl. haha lame i know.

on thursday sasi tony zaf and azie ended up at my house after school to finish up the blue house things.

everyone ended up sleeping. look at sasi. he needs his ass to be pat. hahah

tony slept on my soft floor =p haha

btw i just got back from ika's place. she was making some yellow house things. damn cute right the signs. but the 'G' didnt have enough duck-tape. haha

shes so ready to get married. she helped alter my kebaya, cooked for zaf and she made all the yellow house preparations. she can kahwin weyh! haha

but its nice to see every house helping each other. so far blue house has helped every other house except green house. hahaha and the most annoying part is that yellow house beat blue house by just one freaking mark.

blue=1201pnts and yeallow=1202pnts wtf right? haha

GO BLUE! =)

xx. khid

another year older.

2009-03-24T19:41:00.000+08:00

hey li!

happy 22nd! u are know as old as my sister.

no more calling urself 21. ngeehee

so for li's birthday we did a surprise pool party for her.

she was so blur she didnt even notice her own friends right infront of her face that we're there to surprise her. it was a fun swim session. more like floatie session. hehe

for more pictures see my tagged photos on facebook =)

khid.

have i found u?

2009-03-24T19:27:00.000+08:00

i was lost when u found me.

u patched me up and gave me love.

i thought that u were mine to have.

but it seems that i have made a mistake.

i let u down over and over again.

i left u hanging by a string.

now ur the one who needs help.

i left u and went to someone else.

i bruised u badly i know its true.

i was ungrateful to u.

the one who saved me from the edge.

know i see his not like u.

and im crying missing u.

u were the perfect one for me.

the only one who knew how i felt.

the only one that i have ever truly loved.

there is no point in going back.

i know that u will never come back.

u have better things to do.

and better people to help.

just so u know. i truly miss u the most. u were perfect for me. the other half of me. u make me a better person. and im sorry i hurt u so. please forgive me and comeback.

time to sing a new song.

pictures in my head.

2009-03-20T19:00:00.000+08:00

ARGHHHH FUCKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKK!

i cant believe this is happening.

so we went to the zoo right. and we had some awesome pictures right.

ITS ALL GONE! fuck weyh.

fuckety fuck shit motha f!

i thought it was burned into a cd.

and the sister was all pissed and kononnye her computer nnt virus lah what lah.

so she burned it and deleted it from the laptop.

i deleted it from the camera cause later if the mother sees the pictures it will be an issue.

BUT I JUST ONLY CHECKED THE CD AND NOTHING IS FUCKING IN THERE!

fuck sial. fuck gileeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee. fucking sakit hatiiiii!

fuckkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkk

left out

2009-03-16T12:07:00.000+08:00

like omg!

haha i havent been updating my blog lately. like super duper malas.

i recently just checked out sarah's ninez's and kira's blog. ape ni?! semua dah maju! i feel so left out! so people. await my new layout k. im currently damn inspired by nay love's blog.

sabar yeee =)

xoxo,

khid.

hello.

2009-02-24T20:36:00.000+08:00

hello there friend.
nice to have you back.
where have you been?
i missed u like crazy!
please stay now.
promise me you'll never go away.
not again not ever.

gile love lah,
khid bass ;P
(inside joke!)

long lost lover.

2009-02-20T22:11:00.000+08:00

piano intro.
fingers tapping on the table to the tempo,
head moving with the flow of sweet music.

theres a corner of your heart,
i use to have your whole heart,
but now all thats left for me is a corner,
i will pack my bags just to stay in the corner of your heart,
just dont kick me out totally.

if its a broken part, replace it.
if its a broken arm then brace it.
if its a broken heart then, face it.

i thought i've moved on,
i thought we'd be just fine,
when i look at u a rush of feelings come through me,
to much for me to handle i run and hide,
never to show u my true colors.

the truth hurts but lies worst,
it tears me up,
i try to hold on but it hurts to much,
i try to forgive but its not enough,
to make it all okay.

let me hold you fir the last time its the last chance to feel again.
but u broke me now i cant feel anything.

always has been always will be yours trully,
khidmah mohd raffick

early babies <3

2009-02-20T20:12:00.000+08:00

OMG. please dont think you're so hot lah minah.
so fugly tau!

sorry i haven't been updating my blog for awhile now. gedik je! haha

last week was a week full of birthdays.

on monday IKAlove turned seventeen. she had 3 celebrations. how awesome is that. we surprised her at her house on monday and again at school on tuesday.
right after that they announced birthdays arent allowed to be celebrated in school nemore. FUCKED UP SCHOOL!

then on wednesday HANIlove celebrated her seventeenth birthday with green glasses that kakak and i got her.

and on friday NA'EL celebrated his sixteenth birthday with a bbq in asam. a nice night. loads of people and LG! hahah

sadly i havent uploaded pictures from any parties yet. my desktop is already lagging like crazy. hopefully i'll upload it soon.

btw, on v.day my status was changed from single to taken. hehe

xxoo,
khid

another birthday

2009-02-01T16:40:00.000+08:00

my darling dinie,

happy 18th birthday.
have a good one kayh =)

and please dont waste the year. u were made for something great!

banyak love, khid

.

he's from bastard-ville

2009-01-31T23:36:00.000+08:00

nothing is unusual. everything is the same.
the same jerk he was last year. the one that let u go.
u know whats right but u still followed your heart instead of your brains.
u trusted him but he played u. again.
he's a dumbass to not know what he let pass by him.
ur a top quality chocolates and grade A flower.

he chose to stay drunk and high,
letting the cigarette smoke cloud his judgement.
he calls and curses you on the phone,
thinking when morning comes u'll still be by his side.
in a world of his own, u leave him behind.
only looking forward to best in ur life that is yet to come.

u are more than meets the eye.
you are special and unique.
and u deserve NOTHING but ur own kind.

i love u my dear sarah. remember that.
theres always me and zaf and the rest.
and we promise we'll never fail to keep ur chin up!

lotsalotsa love weyh,
khid!

we wont be seventeen forever.

2009-01-31T18:57:00.000+08:00

hellow mellow yellow!

headed to Mardhiyah's place last night.
it wasn't as happening as we all thought it would be, but it was ok. the whole night was ok until i had some transportation trouble. fuck man. scared the crap outta me. my curfew was at 10. but i ended up reaching home 4 freaking hours late! and then ayesha's phone and mar's iPod got stollen. bloody buggers! so that slowed things down aswell.
i got busted lying to my mom. that freaked me out.
and whats worst is i did what i know was the wrong thing to do! damn im stupid.
i was in the car with boys at 2 am. not a good situation for a girl to be in. =/
i swear i've never done this before. so yeah.

but god damnnn. the ride was awesomeeeee! i know i sound farking jakunted but wth. His rx8 is awesome! haha. god!
i just wanna keep saying it! AWESOMEEE =P

and the company at Mar's place was awesome to.
there was the ususal elroy and the gang then mar and her kk friends and ayesha and hers then dinie came and brought some of his friends. i havent met some of them for so long now. and i made friends with one of hadi's friends. so yeah.

overall. it was dumb and awesome night. ahh what it is to be seventeen ey?

hani loveeee<3

charmaine my twin =)

sayaka chua the traitor! hearts

hazimoo the gedikoo

hearts,
khid!

guess who's back?!

2009-01-29T15:37:00.000+08:00

its NICK JONASSS!

ok so my sister is so gonna hate this. i can so imagine it. she'll say "eee! buat spoil lagu je!" she's a big fan of JM while im one of JB's. so fuck her. look at this super-duper-blazin-hot-eye-candy. arghhh!

cover of gravity by john mayer.

love gile babi,
khid!

im in love.

2009-01-28T02:13:00.000+08:00

with KATY PERRY's thinking of you.

so so awesome. i love her. i lover her styler. i love the dude in the vid. i love this song. i just love the whole lot.

and look! she's got 2 vids for it!
though the second vid is not for the faint hearted. haha.

love,
khid.

sobs.

2009-01-27T15:46:00.000+08:00

yesterday, my baby cousin alysha turned 3!
mak busu invited everyone over to her house. nenek all were there ahhh! i miss them like crazy =(

i saw pictures on my cousins facebook! and a video of alysha singing -.-
they seem like they had loads of fun.
haih
why lah must they live sooooo far away.
i miss them islanders. loves.

HAPPY 3RD BIRTHDAY ALYSHA
thats the birthday girl infront try to hit the piniata.(idk hot to spell) haha
then her sister umairah and the cousins. miss nye!

p.s; see how cute umairah is wearing a blue cheongsam and alysha is wearing a pink cheongsam. HAPPY CHINESE NEW YEAR too. hehe

kisses and Os
khid!

im in love.

2009-01-25T15:34:00.000+08:00

with NICK JONAS!
and im not embarrassed to admit it lol.
he's just sooooo cute and hot and talented.

he is by far the hottest 17 year old for now =)
loves,
khid

im in love.

2009-01-23T15:01:00.000+08:00

WITH JAMES MORRISON!

Let me hold you
For the last time
It's the last chance to feel again
But you broke me
Now I can't feel anything

When I love you,
It's so untrue
I can't even convince myself
When I'm speaking,
It's the voice of someone else

Oh it tears me up
I try to hold on, but it hurts too much
I try to forgive, but it's not enough to make it all okay

You can't play on broken strings
You can't feel anything that your heart don't want to feel
I can't tell you something that ain't real

Oh the truth hurts
And lies worse
How can I give anymore
When I love you a little less than before

Oh what are we doing
We are turning into dust
Playing house in the ruins of us

Running back through the fire
When there's nothing left to save
It's like chasing the very last train when it's too late

Oh it tears me up
I try to hold on, but it hurts too much
I try to forgive, but it's not enough to make it all okay

You can't play on broken strings
You can't feel anything that your heart don't want to feel
I can't tell something that ain't real

Well the truth hurts,
And lies worse
How can I give anymore
When I love you a little less than before

But we're running through the fire
When there's nothing left to save
It's like chasing the very last train
When we both know it's too late (too late)

You can't play on broken strings
You can't feel anything that your heart don't want to feel
I cant tell you something that ain't real

Well truth hurts,
And lies worse
How can I give anymore
When I love you a little less than before

Let me hold you for the last time
It's the last chance to feel again

WAITING,
khid!

like woah!

2009-01-11T22:41:00.000+08:00

it was a crazy2 day! like damn crazy!. woke up at 4.51 am. and left for the airport by 5 someting. all because we had to send kakak to the airport so she could get her ass to singapore to catch the tingtings concert and left me here -_- and now im not even sure if the coussie got het the tickets. doink. the weather was great though at 5 in the morning. very chilly. almost like it didnt seem to be that i was in malaysia at all. by the time waited for kakak to check in and go breakfast at putra jaya and stuff it was 9 when i got home.
was supposed to meet ninez at the kelana jaya train station at 9.45. then... ZzZzzZZz

"adiiikkkk! phoneeee!"
got up and said hello and then cursed my lungs out. it was already 945 and i fell asleep while watching the replacements. hehe

so rushed to meet ninez and met up with kira and headed off to klcc. met up with nabeel there and later on ruzain and song were there aswell. we attended this talk thinggy by sunny lee or yee? idk. haha
it was aight. got me abit inspired to do my best though. cause he made it clear that with the right way of studing anyone can excell in theire addmaths.

blogsake.

for her blogsake. haha

then went to the edufair downstairs. got me and ninez realllyyy inspired now i think. so many options and so many interesting things. although ninez now is stuck between interior designing and architecture, im stuck between interior designing and graphic designing. nottingham uni had this realy super bloody impressive (its too fat to be a booklet) magazine bout graphic designing. its so bloody farking awesome! ninez and i were like so jakunted.

awesome like woah!

and throughout the whole thing my kaki had blisters like gile bapak ah. and my arm was about to come off. then when we wanted to head home the stupid ticket machines buat hal pulak. and the lines could have actually been 3 km long u know! like fuck only. malaysia has got to buck up say kira and i agree 200%. hehe
thank god there were at least some genuinely nice people around. at least not all of them were fucking kiasu bitches and bastards. so we asked for a couple of boys to buy the ticets for us =)

she may say she's awesome, but she's a freak! she read sastera while q-ing. -_-

owh2 and met pavi and thiru as we were about to leave. out of all the placess. hehehe
overall. the day was good for me.

xoxo
khid.

it passed like the wind.

2009-01-09T20:30:00.000+08:00

howdy doo ya'll. haha
so the first week of school is over.
just on the first day we were whining bout school, and now the week is over. what did i tell u bout time passing by so fast.
so far i think i've made the best of my first week. hehe. my homework is up to date. and i havent picked a fight with a teacher yet. almost did though, but tak jadi. hehe. but i dont wanna curse it. so enough bout my progress ok. =D

schools same ol' thing. except some of our usual people aren't with us anymore =( like ibrahim and hadi. but the people who we expected to not be with us is still with us. is all upsidedown man!
there are still unneeded-ass hurting-useless-ear bleeding announcements/beleter in the morning. but they've upgraded from monday morings and a few mornings to EVERY MORNING!

i swear its so fucking useless. they keep talking bout the same things. if the say its because us students dont wanna change, then they have to change first in order for us to change. hey theire the teachers tight? teach us to change lah. not nag je. no one listens to nags dudes!

on the first day of school. jyeah! sarah love and nay love

the latest addition to the braceface club. lol

note book of the year =D

ed board has an early start this year. and so far its ok. all the planning is being done.
btw,
interviews for the editorial board will be held next wednesday after school at ed.board room. do come if interested =)
owh and it's not puan faizah anymore. its puan chuah. yupdeedoo to that =)

jackie HAS been name editor, sarah sub-editor and head of special features. kesian her. its gonna be a tough job. hani secretary, thiru head of photography and i am head of special features.
teacher picked me to be sub-editor, but no thank you. im so afraid of not being able to cope with studies and edboeard and whatever i'll have going on. so sarah got it. hey baby if u need any help just ask =)

eugene told me theres no way WE can beat their batch, well we'll see. haha
i think we can and we will =p

jackie love in the ed board room emo-ing. lol!

so far this week has gone smoothly. may all the weeks of my life and the readers life goes somethly aswell. hehe. drama much.

hearts,
khid.

woahhh!

2009-01-01T00:03:00.000+08:00

first ever picture of '09 babeyh!

HAPPY NEW YEARRR!
2009 is here people.
it is officially my senior year. imma make the best outta it.

was supposed to go out. but tak jadi =(
demam and mcm sume pegi tempat tak best. so owh well. sitting at home watching pirates of the carribean is ok i guess. he he =)

make the best out of the years loves. time is flying by.

khid pattinson <3>
eh
khid pattinson <3>
dah new year!
khid pattinson <3>
HAPPY NEW YEAR ZAF
zafirah z , says: HAPPY NEW YEAR KHID!
khid pattinson <3>
WE ARE OFFICIALLY SENIORS
zafirah z , says:
YEAH!
zafirah z , says:
GAAAAHAHHAHAHA

fadh just sent you a nudge.
khid pattinson <3>
HAPPY NEW YEAR
fadh says:
HAPPY NEW YEAR BABE..

just for u bitch.

2008-12-28T01:15:00.000+08:00

what happens when your lies becomes your truths? when your lies over powers your truths. every word you spoke, everything you did, they were all lies. and you try to look for the truth within you but you find them gone. then you realize all your lies would only end up biting u back. and it'll be too late to come around. what happens when your lies become your life?

when u play with fire, u'll end up getting burnt. as u can see, ur in flames. and i had nothing to do with igniting it. good luck extinguishing it since u have no one but yourself now.

yuna-im not like u

i stood by u. i didnt have to. and if i knew, i'd go away. im not like you. i dont backstab. my dear u should be better than that. i gave u my all back then whenever u needed me. ur lies they cut through my skin whenever i reached for u. im not like u. i dont backstab. my dear you should be my bestfriend.

so sorry for u.

oops i did it again.

2008-12-28T01:10:00.000+08:00

sorry. typo lah. its Christmas. not chrismast. hahahah

ho ho ho.

2008-12-27T01:15:00.000+08:00

merry chrismast yaww.

its a day after but its still xmas right? heheh
so kakak and i headed to eugene's place for chrismast. expected his momayh's tom yum or something but takde. they had catering instead. but its all good. i loved the company. we camwhored the whole night actually. then as always the rockstars would rock it. haha. over all it was nice being around them. and im sure we wont always be seeing some of them sbb sume dah habis skolah kan. so ade life ah konon. hahhaa

omg. which reminds me, im scared for spm and stuffs. and god! i hope i dnt kena ns. shitt!

anyways. picturesss. i'll just put a few. the rest are on my facebook =)

kakak baked ginger cake!

in the car with kakak and khairi.

hani love. rindu ouh.

kakak red me green. very chrismast-y kan? heh

tuan rumah. mistah rockerstarr.

we so fly! hahahha

omg! its edward cullen. china style! haha

ho ho hoooo!

chrismast colours. nat sebok!

with the desperate vampire. haha

more pictures will be uploaded on my facebook. heheh

seasons greetings,
khid<3

neverland

2008-12-20T02:07:00.000+08:00

tonight, the moment all the lights in your house are turned off. you'll find me waiting by the corner of your bed. ready to take you away. just for one night forget all the busyness of the surrounding. give me your hand, follow me and you'll be amazed. your mind will suddenly feel free. tell me what u feel. theres something not right. i can make you fly. fly with me. i'll take u high high up to the sky. touch the sky touch the stars. way above the clouds, jumping over the moon. no one will know where we are. just for one night let go of everything and grab my hand as im floating in the sky. hear the strum of the guitar. feel the breeze in your hair. by the end of tonight all ur worries will be gone. just for one night let me show u how to be fine. wake up in the morning and find urself a different person. and u'll remember me always asif i was a dream. but i'll visit u everynight and remember our journey. just one night will change u forever.

sweet 16!

2008-12-18T22:25:00.000+08:00

today was zafirah zahari's surprise sweet 16 party!
her birthday isnt till next week though. but we figured why not let her celebrate it with her family and decided to surprise her.

and the theme was BLACK&WHITE.

so we met at parade. we were supposed to meet in mamus. but everyone ended up meeting in baskins then headed out to mamus. both harith and i wanted to share and get her something. the best part is we both only had 5bucks each. we were dead poor! so we ended up buying her two balloons. heh heh

the ballons harith and i bought.

ika budget candid! haha

harith!

addie comels!

dinie hotsetaff.

syazwan

adam

while zaf was eating with fara mar ilham and zee, the rest of us were upstairs waiting by the escalator waiting for the cake to come. kite kat atas sume cam tgh sneak sneak. hehe. it was fun tho.

waiting for the cake to be lit.

very the vain pots!

when the cake arrived, with the candles lit. we stepped onto the escalator and started singing "HAPPY BIRTHDAY" she looked up and she was surprised alright. ahha. it was something new to me. the whole surprising org thing. so i was excited. hahah. there was this one time i thought the cake came already so i jumped on the escalator and dinie followed. then only it occured to me that the cake wasnt tere yet! we ran back up the escalator. hahah lawak ah!

surprise surprise.

a birds eye view. from left, clock wise; fara zee ilham zaf mar

zaf terkejut! genuine ke tak?!

blow the candles sweet sixteener!

the hugging begins. hehe

it was syuk's birthday aswell. but kesian him cause not all of us knew. so happy birthday syuk!! =)

birthday boy. he's a 17-er

selebih gambar2 whoring! haha.

ika trying to do the antm but keeps failing and laughing her ass off!

harith and i buat antm tak jadi! first time tak jadi weyh! haha
btw. harith is tip toe-ing. he's SHORTER than me. hehe

random.

addie and kc tgk mtv.

dinie and me. balloons lah!

the other end of the table. and this is when the stupid camera ran oout of batt.
grr

overall the day was a fun day. lepas party tu we all lepaked at baskins tgk addie and harith keje. its what we do everytime we go there. haha and we dont mind. cause we get freeeee stuffs. heheh. im missing the company already. but sadly sarah and meng couldn't make it.

peeps who came lah,
*me
*ika
*fara
*ilham
*zee
*mar
*dinie
*harith
*nael
*addie
*syazwan
*hafidz
*syuk
*adam
*and err i think i left out some people. sorry short term memory! hahah

owh2. and OMG! all the pictures in my simcard suddenly went missing! bengang siallllllllllll! damn fucking pissed off! argh! my memoriessssss! shyte lah!

may god bless u guys! zaf and syuk. happy birthday <3

lotsa love
khid*

ms. jakie-o

2008-12-17T17:21:00.000+08:00

i was cheking out jackie's blog.
totally loving one of her post.
angerrrrs.
hahahha

i miss jackie! =)

click here to check the post out.

miss gile weyh!

2008-12-17T01:08:00.000+08:00

havent been updating my blog as u all can see. its not like i've been busy or anything. just well, lazy. the holidays are nothing special. just out for movies or lunch and stuff. nothing to update about really.

people i've hung out with this hols. even for 5 mins.
*zaf
*harith
*ika
*dinie
*hakim
*syimir
*addie
*nael
*kakak
*li
*radd
*aida
*mummy
*abah
*ilham

and others i might not remember.
harith is working in baskins now. when im bored i go and watch harith and addie work. serious takde life. and the best part is i get free ice cream and stuff. which btw i've become fat again. expectable since all i do is eat now when i'm bored. haha i've nothing to complain about. as long as my clothes still fit i dnt mind. hahah
btw i dnt care anymore. being skinny is so overrated and last season. so no pressure. =)

people i wanna hang out with.

*sarah
*nay
*kira
*ayesha
*amira
*fadh
*fiqi
*rafiq ( who promised to belanja movies)
and who ever else i might've forgotten.

though i think the holidays have kinda changed me. i find that i've been having the wrong morals my whole life. and its time to change. i plan to live life to the fullest. even if it means i'm being cliche'. but whathehell. if i like being cliche, cliche i shall be. if u dont like the new me. then i dont mind. im pretty sure u have ur own life right. so y be all up in mine.

and theres one thing i dont get. people really need to look in the mirror from time to time. as do i, i admit. *this is something i wanna tell. if u dont wanna know stop reading. if u read and disagree then just shut ur bloody pie hole* if u think im or anyone else is being dramatic, let us be. if u feel ur not "dramatic" then dont bother about us. i admit i am reacting by posting this post. i am trying to be the more mature person. i dont mind if u say this is a release tention blog. i know u read it *whoever u maybe* so its just an advice =) u dont wanna take it i dont mind.
u want the truth come find it. i however dont have to prove anything to u. i have a problem with u. its for me to know. u wanna know what it is come find me. u feel that im dramatic than by u reacting so are u. u feel im bitching about u? well ask around i dont. but i know u are. dnt worry im not offended. everyone has the right of theire own opinions. when our senior year starts lets hope u learn your lesson cause i am after all living life to the fullest and fucking anyone that gets in my way.

have a nice day.

and cheers to a new beginning!

hugs
khid*

dream on.

2008-11-29T03:52:00.000+08:00

ever imagined that your life could be like one of the movies u liked?

well yesterday and today made my imagination go extremely wild. as u all know, yesterday was the premier of twilight in malaysia right. apparently the book was way way way better. but im such a newbie at this vampire thing. so this movie is my first step. haha
so i watched twilight. starring robert pattinson. one of the british heartthrobs. woot woot.

**********

then. i watched this other british movie at 3 a.m. its called, angus, thongs and prefect snogging.
the tittle sounds wierd right? well u have to watch it to understand the tittle. its such a chick flick. and god only knows how much i absolutely loooovve chick flicks. and not to mention the hero in the movie. aaron johnson babeyh <3>

here is my favourite qoute of the movie.

"i dont care anymore about being perfect. its sooo overrated. i dont need a nose job or blonde hair. my sex god boyfriend likes me the way i am." haha

owh and this movie features this band called - stiff dylans. check it out. they dont sound that bad at all =D

**********

then today i watched wild child. damn im so chick-ish. i think if i get depressed just shove a chick flick in my face and i'll be alright. haha i liked it. and as always every heroin will have a freaking hot hero. and heres another british heartthrob alex pettyfer<3

**********

then zaf said that i should watch nancy drew. so i did. and here i am at 4.04 am telling u my imagination is running wild. i wont be surprised if i go to bed and get all sorts of funny dreams.

i strongly recommend all u people who are like me to watch angus, thongs and perfect snogging. and check out the dude in there and listen to stiff dylans.

btw, new moon is confirmed to be a movie. just not sure when hope its soon =P

night guys. or morning. whichever =)

khid*

fuck it

2008-11-23T01:23:00.000+08:00

i sit here. right now. the speakers on full blast. my emotions on the highest point. my mind all tangled up. my tears almost running down. but i stop myself. memories flash by. i sit here in the cold. all alone. with no one and nothing but my thoughts. i think and think. tears are now running down. i dont bother to wipe it away. i imagine u would see me cry and u would reach out to me and wipe my tears away. so i sit here. waiting. seasons change and time flies by. i cant move from this spot. i light a candle to guide u here. i am unwell now. i am sick. i am greatly ill. i still wait.

im not crazy, just a little scarred.

after awhile. i've lost my mind. i've changed. inside and out.

world, welcome the new khidmah!

expressed by music.

2008-11-20T15:21:00.000+08:00

James Morrison - save yourself

I'm trying to change to make the best for us
But I'm just the same, same as I ever was
Oh, and if you stay with me, honestly it's what I want
But if you stay with me I know I'll hurt you more

So won't you save, save yourself
By leaving me now for someone else?
If I'm crying out don't listen to it
It's only my heart, save yourself
It's only my heart

So tell me I'm wrong, please won't you change my mind?
This love's so intense sometimes it can lead you blind
Oh, and if you stay with me, honestly it's what I want
But if you stay with me I know I'll hurt you more

So won't you save, save yourself
By leaving me now for someone else?
If I'm crying out don't listen to it
It's only my heart, save yourself
It's only my heart, save yourself

And I don't wanna let you go
But I know that it's the right thing to do, baby
And I don't think I'm that strong to say goodbye
I don't wanna see you cry

So won't you save, save yourself
By leaving me now for someone else?
If I'm crying out don't listen to it
It's only my heart, save yourself
It's only my heart, save yourself
Said, it's only my heart, it's only my heart
Only, only my heart

i officially love james morrison. he has the perfect words to describe me.
i am readable. im expressed by this song. every phrase every sentence every word.

always love,
khidmahraffick.

cavegirl!

2008-11-18T22:29:00.000+08:00

OMG total shocker! SARAH DOESNT KNOW WHO T.I is. dear god. someone help her!

khidmah* says:
i in love ngan T.I
zafirah z , says:
ahhahahahahahhah
sarah says:
whoo?
zafirah z , says:
TI
zafirah z , says:
sarah takkan la you tak tau TI
khidmah* says:
OMG
khidmah* says:
SARAH
khidmah* says:
u can have whatever u liiiikeeeeeeeeeeeeeee
khidmah* says:
yyeeeeeeeeeeaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhhhhh
zafirah z , says:
AHAHAHHAHAHAHHAHAH!
sarah says:
ha????
sarah says:
wth?
sarah says:
im lostt
khidmah* says:
ya allah
khidmah* says:
zaf explain skit
sarah says:
ye ah dah berzaman x kluar
zafirah z , says:
TI is a celebrity in hollywood
zafirah z , says:
HAHAHHAHAHAH
sarah says:
eh?
khidmah* says:
HAHAHHAHA
zafirah z , says:
lagu whatever you like tu
sarah says:
hahahahaha
zafirah z , says:
pergi bukak youtube!
zafirah z , says:
hhahahahhaha
khidmah* says:
HAQHAHHAHAHA
sarah says:
x wtf haha sesat siot ii
sarah says:
lol
khidmah* says:
im cant stop laughing
sarah says:
jap jap
khidmah* says:
HAHAHAHHAHA
khidmah* says:
omg sarah tak tau T.I
sarah says:
STFU
sarah says:
eesh
zafirah z , says:
HAHAHHAHAHA
zafirah z , says:
kesian sarahh
sarah says:
okok nak you tube ah ni!
sarah says:
eesh
zafirah z , says:
HAHAHHAAH
zafirah z , says:
okokokokokk
sarah says:
wait
sarah says:
do i youtube T.I?

adoiiiii. lawak ah. hahha

livelifeliketheresnotomorrow

2008-11-16T23:57:00.000+08:00

i act like i dont care about u.
i tell u to forget me.
i tell u to be my buddy.
i told u to be like before.
u might think im a bitch for doing this.

i am honestly doing this for u.
i dont want u to forget me.
i want to say i love you.
but why feed ur mind with theese thoughts when i'm only gonna hurt u in the end.

u act like like ur ok.
i act like ur just fucking fine.

i know ur not.
i know ur crying on teh inside.
so am i!

6 months ago, we were bloody tight.
i tell u bout my guys and u tell me bout ur girls.
u tell me bout everythingggggggggggggggggg,
and so do i. we were already more than friends just by being friends.

"falling in love with ur bestfriend can be a beautiful thing.

or it can be the ugliest thing ever!"
-sarahmazlan-

everyone falls inlove with theire bestfriend.

brokenhearted,
khid*

grrrrr-nesss.

2008-11-16T00:50:00.000+08:00

dear cupid,
stop playing games with me! just shoot an arrow and don't fucking change your mind okayh?!

i think i dont care.

2008-11-16T00:07:00.000+08:00

how dee doo people!
hey u wanna know some facts about me right now?

im happy. my family is frakin happy now.

i freakin love my skinny mummy, my botak daddy and my kecoh kakak.

i fucking love my happy pills and i fucking miss them.

especially u sarah cause i haven't seen u in ages! haha

and there's another fact. i dont regret my previous post (beware bitch) if anyone terasa, i'm sorry but i'm not really appologizing for what i wrote. i also dont mean to cause any friction. i only mean to tell you the truth and that u really hurt me. u were my fucking best friend. i repeat. WERE my fucking bestfriend. if u think i am stealing ur friends or whatever, u know im not that type of person. honestly everyone thought the same of u. its just that i was the only one to have balls to admit it. and now people are starting to follow in my footsteps. i've gotten to know those who has been hurt by u. and i feel sorry for them. if u wanna talk about me. say it to me. i wont mind. we all have our own views of people. i'm trying to be the bigger person by honestly telling the truth. if u feel that u have the urge to go around calling me bitch and what not than it just shows that ur being childish.

owh and i also hope u dont go around making people feel bad that they are friends with me or u. i have gone around telling the people who know whats going on that i dont mind if they were friends with u. i have no rite to stop them. and frankly i dont mind. they can befriend anyone they want. my problems are mine alone and no one elses. and i hope u think maturely and do the same.

besides that all is well.
but i hate the fact that ilham said something. and i quote
"between the one who will hurt u and the one u will hurt, who will u choose?
burn right?! hahah

so might aswell stay with what i said which is "single and flirting but not available"

hmmm. what else.

owh here's another fact. BYK WEDDINGS dowh cuti ni. fat fat! makan2.

ok bottom line is, im freaking happy people. i believe u have u own life rather than to be all up in mine. so bugger off and have a nice day.

lovelovelove
khid*

realise

2008-11-14T02:33:00.000+08:00

just when i thought harith has fallen off teh face of earth, he calls me up. he was asking bout some stuff but at least he called. haha
then guess what. today we went job hunting. we walked the whole of parade ok! haha i got a job at Nike. but i turned it down. apparently that dude is freaky. so yeah

and i figured why work now?! it really is time for me to fucking enjoy being 16. i mean i feel like crying just thingking of being 17 and going through the stress of SPM and whatever shit. which reminds me, i totally forgot to wish goodluck to everyone! so here goes

good luck dear SMP-ers ;D

so i was having a 90210 marathon and i know some might think its lame to watch 90210 or whatever crap. some might watch just to try and be them. but by watching 90210 i've honestly learnt only so many things.
money never is everything. u can be wealthy but be a screwed up kid (like literally) or ur family is torn up or u may live in a rich town but u actually go through so much stress just to keep up.
i've learnt that friends are truly part of everything. u really have to watch it to understand me. and dont just see whats on the surface. read between the lines. as u should always do.
anyways, there's something about friendship in the 90210 that i find i can relate to, that i can apply to my own problems.

its is that no matter how hard a friend lets u fall. no matter how broken u are. know that whatever they have done, they will still be there to patch your wounds. it might be the same friend that let u fall or it might not. either way, always cherish who u have during that point of time. friend is a word that is hard to understand the meaning until u have truly found 1. but that doesnt mean u go around befriending everyone! even the people who u know are bad for u. that just makes u plain stupid! hahahah

this makes me appreciate my happy pills even more!! =)

harith (10 freaking years)
hadi (5 years)
zaf (3 years babeyh)
sarah (1 happening year)

i freaking love you all. everyone on my freaking contact list =)

fucking love u,
khid*

all for one <3

2008-11-05T23:53:00.000+08:00

ok just when sarah asked if i was gonna update my blog i told her there was nothing interesting going on that i could blog about.
it was a tiring night. i was about to fall asleep.
*msn sound*
woahhhhhhhh 5 freakin people in one chat room. penat k trying to keep up with what they were saying. there were zaf ilham sarah hadi and me. cracked up people. we were talking bout sarah new line/phrase. "no boob sial" its like "no balls sial" but in a female version u know. ahha. then like super bloody crack edi.

then suddenly sarah got silent. she said she was handling a bitch problem. and ilham was bugging to know what was it. what the hell was going on. obviously she was left out. we were so bangang. i said brb nak pee. and zaf said she had to go urut her mom. and sarah said she had a misery business to handle. haha. we started a new convo. and started writing stuff that we want that bitch to know. btw that bitch was bugging sarah. fucktard gile. takde life sial. she's just bloody jealous of what sarah has. so now here we are. waiting for today's big boss sarah to post her blog and for the fucktard to call her again. cause sarah doesnt know who the fuck she is and she used a private number.

this explains my latest myspace user name. its MOBSTRESS. i thought it made sense. haha. like female mobster. female mafia thing going on. so i called it MOBSTRESS. its not in the dictionary though. -_-" haha

dont fuck with us or we'll fuck u inside out =P
have a nice day people.

xoxo
khid*

beware bitch

2008-11-02T21:45:00.000+08:00

hey u. yeah u. u fucking two faced backstabber. u are a fucking bitch. u'll go through life miserable i tell u. i will watch u die and rot away. how dare u. u said u weren't gonna be like that cousin of yours. and u know what. maybe she's not the bad one after all. it has always been u. and in fact, ur worse than what i thought your cousin was. u've always had ur way. u have everyone around ur finger. oh wait let me rephrase that. u HAD everyone wrapped around ur finger. ur disguise is falling apart. people are starting to see u. bare naked. through all ur fucking lies.
u said u weren't a boyfriend stealer. u said u weren't gonna be her. i dont care abt him. i care that u fucking turned on me. and u said he flirted with you. and how stupid was i to believe u. ur the one who fucking flirts around. ur a fucking slut. u lied to everyone. and no one wants u around anymore dont u get it. and this is so not the first time u did this to me. i've always put up with u. i wont do it anymore. let me show them who u are. u breath fire. u look like Satan.
u told me. every time he tried to kiss u, u would push him away. u told me it was because u knew how i still felt about him at that time. u said u never kissed him. u said u had no intentions of being with him. ur such a liar. ur a fucker. u fuck with peoples lives. in fact i helped u with him because i thought u were sincere. only a dumb fuck like me would freaking trust u.

guess what. a friend called me up. a true friend. she told me everything. and she got all the info straight from him. she said that he said that u were the fucking one who came on to him. WHILE I WAS STILL WITH HIM. how much more of a slut could u be. stealing peoples boyfriends. have u no dignity? no respect? u know how i felt about him. u know ow special he was to me. and how i was to him. u made me believe that he hasn't changed. well he had. but now he's back to his old ways. all because of U.
did u know that he still at least talks to me. he still cares about me. he tells me everything he felt and feels about u. even he hates u know. and many others do. u said eww when u saw him. but u were stuck to him the whole night. couldn't u see he was trying to fucking avoid u. u hypocrite.

and how dare u talk bad about me and still come to my house. didnt u tell someone that u didnt wanna come to my house because i didnt go to urs. well why in the world did u think i didnt wanna fucking go to ur house. because i hate u duhh. and u boleh taktau malu datang dengan takde adab nye. sial lah engkau. fuck u i hate u. and from this moment on, i dont know u. are dead to me. when u walk my way i'll look away. when u sit with me at recess i'll ignore u at 120% concentration.

look,see,enjoy

2008-11-02T19:19:00.000+08:00

look what i found. idk why. but i really like her. ever since her LM days. ahah

smelly!

2008-11-01T13:10:00.000+08:00

after school yesterday we headed of to parade.we somehow fitted 9 people in a saga. can u believe that? it was like a circus act. and everyone could smell evryone else. thank god there weren't any cops around. and if we had gone to anywhere else but parade, we would've died. my head literally was stuck to the top of the car. no place to move. and aka sat on victore , anis sat on tony , ayesha sat on zaf at the front seat and i sat on sarah. it was fun tho' =)

pictures =)

pictures are all outta place. haha sorry.
from top;we makan-ed
checking them baskin robins boys out. haha jkjk. they were na'el addie redza zain and amirul
fed tony ice cream. harith sponsor. =)
and us girls in the loo =)
ayesha made lips out of her burger. lol

xoxo
khid*

sarah dunne <3

2008-10-30T00:02:00.000+08:00

dear sarah,

i know what you're going through.
i feel ur pain sistah.
i told u i know how the story ends,
but i didn't tell u i knew the story line.
well i didn't tell u that i kinda guessed it too. hahha

life is filled with surprises. ups and downs.
life is like a roller coaster.
it'll go round and round. but it'll always go back to the starting point. and u go through life with the exact same people u started the ride with. no one gets ditched. every one is strapped in safe.

i know u dont like this story line. but hey, i told u that the big man is in control right. we can only plan. we should be grateful for what we have now. and not reminisce. u made ur choice to push him away. and now u regret it. just thank god u realised in time.

alaaa. lagipun u know u got ur friendssss whom i cant list down sebab byk sgt. hahah
i know u love him. he is your alex. and trust me rosie, if all goes well, we already know the ending.

we all love you sayang!

xoxo
khid*

happy ending.

2008-10-29T00:03:00.001+08:00

the problem with fairy tales is that they set a girl up for disappointment. in real life the prince goes off with the wrong princess. or the spell wares off and two lovers realise they're better of as whatever they are. but i'll confess, every once in awhile a girl craves her fairy tale ending.

quote from gg s02e08

xoxo
khid*

flyboys <3

2008-10-28T14:28:00.000+08:00

good luck to my fly boys on their final paper!!!
after this dont forget that u guys work for me =D

best of luck to;
syafiq izzad radzi*
rafiq azri*
jarome tan*
and yang sewaktu dengan nye =P

goodluck charm,
khid*

breaking my back babeyh

2008-10-26T22:34:00.000+08:00

*chatter chatter*
"ADIIKKKK! bangunnnnnnn! maklang dtg!" *bang* she opened the door.
"which maklang?? i nak tido. jgn kacau" rude much. haha

got up took my towel. drag my self to the toilet, brushed my teeth washed my faced and went back to the room.*boom* back on the bed. hehe. got up again put on a t-shirt and shorts and tied my hair neatly.
"do i look like i just woke up abah?" hehe
"nope u look natural" my dad gave me a smirk.
"heyyyyyyyyyy whats that supposed to mean?! haha"

abang handsome and me =D

and maklang kaklong akak kakda kakwa and mariah was downstairs. i guess they were really bored cause by the time i got down they were playing boggle. doink.
kakak was out with aida for some interview thinggy. she got to fly around KL with uncle amin. (he's super cool)
*bancuh air*
*panaskan murtabak*
then talk talk talk.

when kakak got home they were just abt to leave. and mummy and abah was gonna get ready to go to uncle dahlan's house. and what else was to happen but someone else coming over. then makcik and gang came. mummy and abah panned to go out after that. then paklang came after that pulakkkkk. continued by makandak and maklonggggg. hahahah just when we were complaining that no one came and visited us for raya, trus everyone came at once and we couldnt handle it. aiooooo. hahaha so now here i am. tired as hell.

and maklong is staying over for the night so YEAYYY but still very tired. hehe

yesterday the folks from singapore came. that was also very tiring. but went to some makan2 thingy first at tuition before that. so yeah. thennnn. errrrrr owh yeah, sent the singapore peeps to datin makngah's house and hung out there for a while.

faris selamba korek bag i at the makan thingy

i made the boys walk me home =p

camwhore otw =D

will be going to maklang's house tomorrow to help her out with some stuff pulak. her kid is inviting some friends over so yeah. anyways, to bloody lazy to freaking write summore. so thats it.

and ridha and i were bored so i played his and he played mine =) hockey on his and racing on mine hehe

lovehugskiss,
khid*

through the monsoon

2008-10-24T20:25:00.000+08:00

hey ho people.

so, kakak's back weeheee. we couldnt stop talking since last night.
so bingit ok the whole house. kesian gile abah. saw her pictures from toronto. looks like a really nice place u know. she went to the museums and stuffs. so yeah. malas mau cerita. =p
she got mummy a really nice watch. bought two gap shirts for abah (he dah maju pakai gap) and two bags for me and two for her. she baught a coach bag for herself and bought me some 5 dollar bag. shitface btul. haha but its the thought that counts i guess =/

daddy dearesttt

mummy mummy <3>

she was supposed to reach at 4pm yesterday. but her flight got delayed so she only reached at 10. hmph. so while waiting for her i camwhored with hani =D

hani love

so today we were busy cleaning the house getting stuffs for tomorrow. the peeps from singapore are cominggggg. yay. but before that i'm probably going to some makan2 thingy at tuition. cant wait for them to come over. then maybe after that wanna go lepak with dhirahhhh!

80 people 20 cars. gahhh ramai nye

budak budak tak tau malu kat tesco =p

part 2. hahahhaha

lotsa lotsa loveeeeee
khid jane bond =*

lip ring

2008-10-23T16:24:00.000+08:00

i met u for the first time today since the longest time.
ur so lame now. ahha
owh but ur still hot dont worry.
owh and definitely still sexy =p
dayumm i miss you.

shocker

2008-10-22T00:07:00.000+08:00

omg omg omg. no way. he has a gf?!

wtf. ass. so much for "loving me" hahahahha

jane bond!

2008-10-21T23:43:00.000+08:00

i started to forget how it felt when i was with you.
all the joy we went through.
i know i missed you but i was too scared to admit it.
i know if u look into my eyes you'll find the truth.
today u remind me of what we use to be.
i wished the moment didnt have to end.
it was like during the good old times.
when we were wacky and careless.
owh the good times.
memories flash by in my mind when we touched today.
and all i could do is remember.
how we held hands.
the first time we ever were truly happy with just being us.
no need to wear a mask to hide what we feel anymore.
but now the mask is back on again.
i hate it.
but i know its for the best.
we've been inlove forever.
and i know no matter what we will still be.
i will always be there for u.
not letting you fall.
but i will also be screaming "i wanna save you. but will you save me too?"
the question that can not be answered.

i have and always will have doubts about everything. i am very indecisive. i am twisted and confused. i never make a wise choice. but i have never regreted anything.

i am bond. jane bond =p
xoxo

be strong.

2008-10-21T19:31:00.000+08:00

to loose money will only leave u poor.
to loose friends would only make u tough.
but to loose someone close will tear u apart.
to loose someone at all will make u cherish everyone u have.
always know that whoever that has left you is in a better shape.
either with a better person or a better place.
all we can do is pray and hope for the best for them.
and all we have to do is move on and be strong.
be the best we can to make them proud.
to those that has lost someone, know that death and break-ups only lead to someone braver and wiser.

always love,
khid*

greatest view.

2008-10-18T23:09:00.000+08:00

this is so random ok. i found it in kakak's car.

this morning mummy abah and i sent kakak to the airport. she was heading to canada. it will surely be fun for her. i hope she doesn't read this but i miss her already="(

mummy and abah missing her already. lol emo gile

abah tgh emo hahah

somehow i was the only one smiling =)

went home then went for makan2 session at paklang's place. then went to uncle hj daniels place then headed to tok uda's place. tiring like hell.

at uncle hj daniel's place i was greeted by a whole lot of old toyota corolla's. it was bloody cute! they were like m&ms. in all colours whiteblack yellow green. then we sat and ate. and to my surprise there was more. before i went home i counted that there were 14 of them. so comel! haha. highlight if the night! =)

xoxo
khid lah

update.

2008-10-09T23:47:00.000+08:00

its been awhile since i've updated my blog. and alot has happened since. and frankly im just ass whiped lazy to story everything. so here are some quickies.
-raya in singapore was bloody fun!
-duit raya not up to mark.
-i find myself loosing contact with people. thats probably caused by the fact that my phone is fucking rosak-ed haha.
aioo what else ah. seriously i cant remember so fuck it =)

xoxo
khid*

feeling festive.

2008-09-29T21:15:00.000+08:00

today got up to a text from sarah saying " happy khid's day." and with no one at home. owh so boring. got up, lazed around once again, bathed and got the urge to bake a cake. so i korek-ed mummy's recipe book and found the recipe for her owh so famous chocolate cake. mmm. i could taste it in my mouth already. mummy went to the saloon and when she got back she found me in the kitchen. she was kinda pissed that it was messy but i cleaned it up i promise =p

i baked my cake using mummy's recipe and then i let it cool. went online and search for buttercream icing recipe. i was bloody multi-tasking. and in case anything had gone wrong no one was at home. i was baking and on the net at the same time -.-"

while i was making the icing, zaffy came to the house. she helped me do the icing. and therefore i give u my not so famous buttercream covered chocolate cake. =) we were playing with the colours. pink and blue so dont represent raya! haha

after it was done si na'el gedik wanted cake. so he came over and then him, hadi and addie syg melantak lah. i dont know what it really tastes like but they screamed "sedap" through the phone. i hope it really is sedap =/ cause i dont think my tongue is functioning. so yeah.

owh2 tomorrow is the last day of puasaaaa! and tomorrow, ninezayesharamlanmusaismail is turning the big 16! woohooo. but she's all the way in singapore now.

lovelove,
khiddd*

stupid phone camera

2008-09-28T22:10:00.000+08:00

another day another buka. it was a lazy day. again -.-" mummy and abah headed off to the house in melacca with some of my cousins to clean up the house. kakak and i were supposed to clean the house and pack our bags and do whatever necessary to get ready for raya. but she slept and i watched gossip girl. haha btw GILE BABI SCANDALOUS u know the second season. haha then got a call from harith ajaking for buka. so i just waited for 630 to come and head off to parade. 630 came and passed. then i reached parade at the same time mei did. so thank god i wasn't a loner. ahha. went to sushi king first but as expected it was full. then waited for harith and addie syg to come. they came and then cari tempat to makan. but obviously everywhere is full since its almost buka kan.zaffy baby didnt come =( she was out shopping with her mummy. so we ended up at secret recipe. at first it was apparently full. but the kakak there was really nice and gave us a seat. so duduk, order, tunggu makan, makan then bayarrr. addie syg was really quiet. haha biasalah. lol

then headed off to coffee bean. taha was working there so we gedik mintak discount. haha but didnt get. but we got a free drink. heh heh sat outside and started playing cards. we were really lifeless. hahah. we played
* dai ti
*babi
*black jack errr dont remember what else. that was how lifeless we were.

in the middle of playing cards harith saw kak juey kite kat bawah coffee bean tu. then we all startded shouting "jueee" "azaammm" "iwannn" haha but no one heard -.-" so mei came up with a brilliant idea to jatuhkan something. so i droped a plastic cup. didnt work. then i sat on the floor and danggled my feet. haha IT WORKED. lol. we cought theire attention. then in a blink of an eye azam was at coffee bean. gile bapak cepat. haha he lepak for like 2 mins and then he was off. we played and played and then azam lepak again with us. they played black jack and i think azam got 5 bucks kan? haha but harith lost the most of money kot. then mummy called so i had to balik =( but whatever it is, as lifeless as we were it was fun just hanging out and being cam orang bodoh. haha =)

the secret lovers. HAHA

addie syg

mole.E =p

mei baby

when harith lost his money. haha

yes! proof that harith smokes! haha

addie syg

hug hug,
khid*

goodnight

2008-09-27T22:54:00.000+08:00

buka buka! went to alysha's house for ms sheila's farewell partay! first of all idk ms sheila. and second i felt damn lost there. but not as lost as farhaan and eugene. so yeah. i was ok =) that was the only highlight of the day =/ it was a lazy day. so yeah.

owhh. and we cant ponteng class nemore =( all the work for us are done. cept for azam. he still got loads of work. kasihan lo!

kisses,
khid*

curi-ed from nay nay love!

2008-09-25T23:59:00.000+08:00

instructions: never see the questions before you arrange the names.
-all mentioned below are tagged.

i will tag.

1. hilyah raffick
2. sarah mazlan
3. ninez ayesha
4. amira hani
5. eugene mathew

1. how did you meet 1?
since i was born. she's my kakak <3

2. on a scale of 10 - 0, how would you rate your friendship with no. 1?
100000000000

3. how long have you known 4?
hmmm since i was std 5 or 4 kot

4. how do you know number 3?
same class this year. baru 9 months kenal. tp gile geng ahh! haha

5. where's 5?
at home kot. 15.

6. a facts about number 1?
i love her like crazy. but she's not supposed to know tht.

7. who is 4 going out with?
adi johan ali yang dah kurus -.-"

8. what does 1 do for a living?
she bitches for a living =p

9. would you live with number 3?
haha mesti lah! mak die cool! and adik die comel =D

10. what do you like about number 2?
she so gets me. and as ninez said. she byk kawan lelaki hot! haha

11. do you miss number 5?
yesssss. =(

12. would you make out with number 4?
haha. im sorry hani.

13. what's your opinion on number 2?
she sucks at emo-ing =P

14. what's your favourite memory with number 5?
him singing to me. =)

15. what will you do if number 1 and 2 were going out?
why not. its just going out. makan maybe? haha jkjk

16. ever had a long conversation with 5?
haha. duhh! sampai credit sume habis boleh sambung pakai house phone pulak. haha

17. have you ever slept at 2's house?
nope. not yet.

18. do you hang out with 3 a lot?
yes. 5 days a week and i love it =)

19. who have you known the longest?
kakak ku!

20. what will happen if number 1 and 5 have a relationship?
HAHAHA omg! nightmareeeeeeee.

21. how often do you talk to 1?
evryday

22. what about 2??
at school and on teh phone. so everyday lah. haha

23. have you ever thought 3 more than a friend?
what else? my therapist maybe. owh wait. thats kira! haha

24. would you go on a date with number 5?
haha hell yeah.

25. do you dream about number 2?
hahah the wackiest dreams kan babe!

26. what did no.4 do to you that you can never forget?
errrr. her pink room!

27. what have you done for/to 1 that the person never forgets?
i gave her a scar in a fight =D

28. what's 3's hobby?
haha. laugh macam org gile. and suke ckp when he hand is shaking. owh and suke kutuk pn tannnn! hahahaha

29. tag more people.
liyana
aivin
jackie
steph
joanne

snap snap 2

2008-09-25T22:30:00.000+08:00

we did "work" ;)

got bored so started playing with phones

got even more bored so started playing with the camera =p

and the camwhoring began

talk about random

trying to be the jolie-pitt?! haha

look at the two at the back. lol

hani pakai bracesss =D

right after this was when teacher entered and said
everyone can hear us jumping. -.-" haha

we got bored once again and found ourselves in front of azam's lappie with a
video of eugene singing. kata rockstarr! haha